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Dumb Gym Shit

July 16, 2020




Well, it’s not my gym, but I treat it like it’s mine. There are just a few things that get under my skin ughhhhh!!!!!

Like this!!!!


Come on, dude. Really?!?!?


I’m not trying to hear that it will help with balance and make you jump higher bull shit.


It might help, I just see the risk to benefit being to high. So instead of saying “dude, you can barely walk straight you have no business doing that”


I just said, “Sir, I’m sorry but I’ll have to ask to please remove yourself from the wobble board”. He said, “excuse me”. I said “we don’t allow those types of movements in this facility. They are dangerous and we cannot be held liable for any injury that can occur.” Meanwhile, we had a group session going on in the other room consisting of tire flip, sled hammer swings, kettlebell snatches, and an array of other fun stuff.


He was upset, it was written all over his face. We had about a 45-second stare down. He gave me the meanest look he could muster, no problem. I stood there calm, relaxed. By the look in his eyes he seemed like he was searching in his head for something to say, he had nothing. No argument, nothing. That was easy.


He placed the wobble board back where he found it and did smith machine back squat instead.


You see some of the shit I have to go through!!


I was not trying to fill out an accident report on a Saturday morning.



So keeping with the spirit of things, here goes my top 10 dumb gym shit list:


Warning!!! Please please don’t do any of the below or anything similar.


10) Bicep curls in the power rack


9) Not wearing deodorant


8 ) Thinking that your boxers are gym shorts


7) Rapping the lyrics to any Tupac song while doing crunches


6) Asking the trainer for advice and in the same sentence saying you know what you need to do


5) Asking the trainer what supplements and how much you need to take


4) Telling the trainer every Monday how bombed you get every Saturday and Sunday.


3) When the same person in #4 tells the trainer “it’s my metabolism”.


2) When you lift your shirt in front of the mirror to see if you have abs “now” after a set of tri extensions.


1) Screaming to lift 30lbs dumbbells then looking to see if anyone is looking at you.



There you go, my top 10 of dumb gym shit.


I will most likely have lots more ridiculous experiences during the meantime at a commercial gym. Keep your eyes open you’ll most defiantly hear or see some funny shit.


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